An XFiles Musical!
by sempaiko
Summary: Just as the title describes! But I warn you! Songs done to Disney songs... so it might not be your thing. I already know this fanfic sucks, but I thoughts I'd post anyway... R&R!


I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING HERE! NOTHING! NOT X-FILES, NOT ANYTHING DISNEY! NO SONGS HERE! NOTHING!

_AN: I have to warn you all... this won't be really enjoyable unless you are very familiar with the disney songs featured. And please, people, I wrote this when I was like in middle school, so forgive me. I just found it when i was going through my old school stuff, and thought I'd post it. Also, it takes place somewhere in the 6th or 7th season, so it really has nothing relevant to do with the newer plot. okay, and no bad reviews (if any lol-this fanfic sucks!) I already know it blows, I just thought it'd be funny to post. LOL. I know I'm gonna regret this...._

**An X-Files Musical**

(X)

Setting: The Lone Gunmen Headquarters. The three are sitting, huddled around a strange looking device in front of them.

Byers: What do you think it is? (looks up at his two colleagues)

Langly: (shakes his head, and fold his arms) I don't know, but whatever it is, it's doing something.

Frohike: Where'd you get this anyway, Byers?

Byers: It was in front of the door, just sitting there, beeping. I was afraid it was a bomb, until I had a closer look. It's nothing I've ever seen. But the module right there must indicate some kind of... well, I read about in a science journal... It's a spatial indicator. It was all hypothetical and in theory, but I caught a glimpse of what it might have looked like in a picture, and that module looks very similar.

Frohike: Very long descriptions for something so small.

Langly: (rubs his chin) I don't think that's what it is. I mean, you were right, they are very controversial and haven't been proven. We haven't proven there are other spatial dimensions anyway.

Frohike: Like that show on the sci-fi channel?

Langly: Yeah, but I don't think this little doo-hikee has anything to do with different dimensions.

Byers: It's turning on, it's going.

Frohike: You're right. It looks like something turned it on. Or someone when they dropped it at our doorstep.

Langly: But why us?

Byers: I don't know.

(the machine starts a high pitched sound and starts glowing. It's about to launch the X-Files universe into a different dimension. Frohike knows this and dives for a long-term tape recorder. It could tape up to two days.)

Frohike: I want to know what happens, thinking we won't remember any of this once it's over. It was nice knowing you guys. (he presses the record button.)

(The theme song starts, everything normal. At the end, the words: Y'ALL READY FOR THIS? appear.)

(X)

Setting: Syndicate meeting room. Several members are there, not including CSM. They are scattered about the room, when one member comes in.

Main Syndicate Man: I'm glad you're all here. It seems the better half of us have survived the attack. I feel good knowing that we are all together once again.

Syndicate Man 1: What are we going to do about the rat?

MSM: Which one?

SM 1: Spender senior. He must be killed.

SM 2: He ratted us out! He left us to die!

SM 3: We must do something.

MSM: I know, I know. Gentlemen, I must say you've come back more ravenous than ever. But... I have a feeling that some of you still don't want to be a part of this wonderful group. So I have one thing to ask... are you in, or out?

SM 2: That depends-

MSM: It's a simple question. Are you in or out?

(Music from Aladdin and the King of Thieves begins, for the song "Are you in or out?" MSM jumps on a coffee table.)

MSM: I remember a time, when crime was sublime,

There were plenty of lies to be told.

We'd plunder and pillage, and plague a whole village,

With neither a worry nor care.

Then along came this man with his Morleys in hand,

But he ratted us out in the end!

So rally the troops, we were meant to regroup,

And return to out roots once again.

Are you in or out? Gotta know without a doubt.

We're the ones you need for a dirty deed,

We're the best, success is guaranteed.

Are we men or mice, take a slice of my advice!

You want fearless leaders,

Ones that are strong and stout,

Better vote for us, are you in or out?

Everyone else: We used to smart,

Yes horrendously heartless.

In ravaging raid we were rough!

We knew that we had to be blissfully bad,

But Spender brought the sensitive stuff.

Then we strained the path, with our rigorous wrath.

Now we're taking a bath in the oil!

But we'll reclaim our winning, our humble beginning,

In turmoil and torture we trust!

Are you in or out?

MSM: Double-crossers or devout!

Put your faith in me, pretty soon you'll see,

We're the place for generosity!

Are you foe or friend?

Here's the path I recommend!

You want a ride to space, we're got the fastest route,

Better vote for us, what's it going to be?

Are you in or out?

SM 1: We'll go testing in all the right places!

SM 2: From California to DC!

SM 3: Imagine the fear on their faces,

When we drop the black plague in their skin!

MSM: Are you in or out? If you're with us, give a shout!

Everyone: Yeah!

MSM: I need you all the way, to the glory day!

We'll start a life of lies that pays!

Are you out or in?

SM 1: Make a choice now sink or swim.

MSM: You can stick with us, or stick around and pout.

What's it going to be, consider carefully,

Everyone: Are you in or out?!

(music ends)

MSM: Well?

SM 4: Well, I don't know. Doesn't anyone want all this to end, I mean, we all have family right?

MSM: You are rejecting the New Syndicate?

SM 4: Yeah, what are you going to do? Kill me because I don't want to join?

MSM: Something like that.

SM 4: You can't do that...

MSM: I can, and I will.

A sour thumb always sticks out.

Sorry, it looks like you're out.

(X)

Setting: Alleyway behind the FBI headquarters. Alex Krycek, decked out in a leather jacket and black pants, looks around cautiously.

Krycek: Should I, or shouldn't I? He would certainly attack, without thinking. But I must know if Mr. X has contacted him. Following him would be not as simple as it looks. Last time he saw me, I was working for the Syndicate, but now I'm against them. How can I make him see? (pauses and opens the door to the inside of the parking garage of the FBI building. He heads inside and hides in the shadows.)

(X)

Setting: Mulder's office. He's sitting there looking at a picture of his sister.

Mulder: Samantha. Where are you?

I've searched, only to find strange aliens and clones.

You have to be out there somewhere. With the aliens or not?

I must know. Scully won't be of any help, she thinks I'm delusional and plain old paranoid. Am I really?

(music from Hercules starts, the song "I can go the Distance" starts. Mulder looks up at the ceiling and sighs. He stands and looks around at the empty room.)

Mulder: I have often dreamed, seeing her again.

Of a great warm welcome, from my long lost sister.

Where my family's there, all together here,

And yet a voice keeps saying,

This is how it's meant to be.

(opens the door, bursts out, runs to the elevator.)

I will find her yes, I will find my sister!

She'll be here someday, if I can just look!

I know every mile, will be worth my while.

I will go most anywhere, to find out where she is.

(the elevator stops, he jumps out and heads towards the entrance of the FBI building. He comes to the front desk and nods at the secretary there. The music still plays in the backgrounds, silently.)

Has Agent Dana Scully come through yet?

Secretary: Sorry, sir, no she hasn't.

Mulder: Thanks. (He turns and heads towards the garage.)

I am on my way, I can find my sister!

I don't care how far,

Somehow I'll find her!

(Swings on a pole and leaps towards his car.)

I know every mile, will be worth my while.

I will go most anywhere,

To find out where she is.

(Looks up at ceiling again. He sighs, as music ends, and gets in the car. He looks up, only to see a shadow in the distance. He gets out of the car, and the figure moves. The figure steps accidentally into the light.)

Mulder: Krycek? (The figure runs, he chases.) Krycek! Get back here!

Krycek: Not while I live, Mulder!

Mulder: Krycek! (he gains, tackles him and pulls his gun and aims it at him, as he pins him down.) Krycek, why are you following me? (Krycek resists, doesn't talk.) Answer me!

Krycek: (breathes heavily.) Something's happening, I need to know if Mr. X will contact you.

Mulder: Mr. X is dead.

Krycek: He's not. And I have a feeling that he's going to contact you. Something's happening Mulder, something big. Even you won't be able to handle it.

Mulder: Another alien plague, another cover-up? What is it this time, Krycek? Tell me.

Krycek: (roughly.) I don't know. But it's happening, and happening fast. You and Scully are in way over your heads.

Mulder: I've heard it before. I'll hear it again.

Krycek: This time it's different. More down to earth. You just watch yourself, Mr. X will come, and then you'll know. I'll be there, listening in.

Mulder: You were one with the Syndicate. You used to be a one-man crusader, after you betrayed me.

Krycek: And I still am.

Mulder: I can never trust you.

Krycek: I'm not here to kill you. At least not yet...

Mulder: I should kill you now.

Krycek: Then you'll be kicked out of the Bureau, torn away from your partner. You love her so much, you'll never forgive yourself, you lonely bastard.

Mulder: (punches him across the face.)

Krycek: (growls:) Everyone can see it, but you. You're blind to the truth you would hold most dear. (he looks into Mulder's eyes with disdainful fury.) I'm telling you Mulder, you're not ready to kill me.

At least not yet, like I said.

Mulder: I won't let you go.

Krycek: What are you going to do? Arrest me?

(Mulder reaches for his cuffs, and in that instance, Krycek hits the gun away and punches Mulder. He gets up and runs. Mulder quickly follows. Krycek, burst through the stair well door, and runs up. Mulder is close behind. Music from Aladdin, the song "One Jump Ahead" starts up.)

Krycek: I've gotta get away from him!

Got to keep, one step ahead of Mulder,

One swing to get away!

I'll run whenever I need to, that's anytime!

One step ahead of the Bureau,

That's not all, and that's no joke.

These guys don't appreciate I'm me!

Mulder: Stop you! Krycek, coward!

Krycek: No way! It's just a simple thing, guy!

Mulder: No it's not, take it back now!

Krycek: I can take a hint, gotta face the facts,

I'm my only friend, myself!

Mulder: Who?

Krycek: (heads out a door, and runs across the roof of the Bureau building, ducks behind a pipe, as Mulder comes bursting through. Some singing girls sit atop the stairwell entrance.)

Singers: It's so sad to see Alex has hit the bottom,

He's become a one-man rise in crime.

We'd blame the Bureau, then again, who doesn't?

Krycek: Gotta fight to live, gotta live to fight,

Tell you all about it when I got the time!

One step ahead of the hitman,

One skip ahead of the black plague,

Next time I think I'll use a car!

(jump across the building to the next one, barely making it, and falling on his face.)

One step ahead of Mulder,

One hit at getting away!

I think I'll take a stroll down the block!

(Gets up and heads to edge, spins his head and sees Mulder getting ready to jump across too.)

Mulder: Stop rat! Krycek! Ass hole! Liar!

Krycek: Let's not get too hasty!

Singers: Still we think he's rather tasty!

Krycek: Got to fight to live, got to live to fight,

Otherwise, we'd get along?

Mulder: Wrong! (jumps across, makes it, falls on his stomach. Struggles to get up.)

Krycek: One step ahead of Mulder,

One step faster than the Syndicate,

One trick of disaster,

They're quick, but I'm faster!

Here goes,

Better start running fast,

Wish me a better life,

All I have to do is jump!

(Jumps from the building off the ledge. Mulder runs to edge, looks down, and sees no one. He curses and turns from the ledge and walks back. Below, Krycek opens the Dumpster he fell in, and leaps out. He brushes himself off.)

Krycek: Rat boy, Liar! I don't care much.

If only they'd look closer!

Would they see a poor guy?

Not siree.

They'd find out there's so much more to me.

(Music ends, and he looks over his shoulders, and heads down the block, disappearing into the busy crowds.)

(X)

Setting: Scully's apartment. She is doing work on her computer, when she hears the door being knocked. She gets up and heads towards it.

Scully: Who is it?

Mulder: It's me.

Scully: (opens door and lets him in.) What is it? It's my day off.

Mulder: I know, it's just that I saw someone today.

Scully: (puzzled she frowns.) Who?

Mulder: Krycek.

Scully: Wh- did you talk to him?

Mulder: Yeah, chased him down and asked him why he was following me.

Scully: And...

Mulder: He said something about Mr. X was alive and that he thinks he will contact me. He also said something big was going down. Something we couldn't handle.

Scully: What could that possibly be? (She shakes her head and sits down at her computer again, but turns it off, and closes the top.) Mulder, I could say that we're getting too old for this...

Mulder: (smiles.)

Scully: So. What do we do? Wait around until Mr. X contacts you?

Mulder: Seems like it. (his cell-phone rings, and he reaches in his pocket and pulls it out.) Mulder.

Skinner (from phone): Mulder, I want you and Scully to go investigate a killing down on 34th street. The man killed seems to have no identification. And he died from, it appears to be, suicide. But I doubt it. I want you guys over there, quickly.

Mulder: Okay. (he hangs up. He turns to Scully.) Skinner wants us down on 34th street.

Scully: Why?

Mulder: A strange killing.

Scully: What else is new?

(X)

Setting: 34th street. Police cars litter the streets and officers are going in and out of a building. Mulder and Scully drive up and get out of their car.

Mulder: (steps inside the building, up the stairs, and finds the room where the body was located. The person killed is face up on the floor, his wrists slit. He is elderly and has an expensive suit on. By the looks of it, the man was pretty well off. Foul play seemed to fit in nicely.) Doesn't seem like he killed himself.

Scully: I'll have to do an autopsy report to find out.

Mulder: (turns to some pictures that have been taken, and puts some in his pocket. Turns and leaves with pictures.)

Scully: Where are you going?

Mulder: To get some help on this man's identification.

(X)

Setting: The Lone Gunmen Headquarters. The three are sitting around a strange devise, staring at it. There is a buzz at the door, and Frohike gets up and looks at the video screen. He saw their colleague Mulder.

Frohike: (opens the door, unlocking many locks.) Mulder! So glad you dropped by.

Mulder: What's that? (points to glowing machine.)

Frohike: The truth is, we don't know. Anyway, why did you drop by?

Langly: I just think he's jealous about how we can solve most of the things he wants to know.

Mulder: Bullseye.

Byers: Mulder, what can we do you for today?

Mulder: A person's identity. (hands him a picture of the body.)

Langly: Snappy dresser for suicide, don't you think?

Frohike: Yeah. (grabs the photo and scans it into his computer. The computer outlines the face and then starts comparing to many other faces.) This may take a while.

Mulder: What are you guys into for this week's edition? (picks up a rough draft of their newsletter.)

Langly: Simple government cover-up, again.

Byers: Yeah, government cover-up.

Frohike: That's right!

(music from the Lion King starts up, from the song "Hakuna Matata". Frohike smiles and spins to Mulder, with Byers and Langly at his sides.)

Government Cover-up! What a frightening phrase.

Langly: Government Cover-up! Ain't no passing craze.

Byers: It means all worries for the rest of our days.

All three: It's our problem, see, philosophy.

Government Cover-up.

Frohike: (turns to Langly.) Why, when he was a young hacker.

Langly: When I was a young hacker!

Byers: Very nice.

Langly: Thanks.

Frohike: He found his hacking like a certain appeal,

He could hack the whole city after every meal.

Langly: I'm a sensitive soul, though I seem thick-skinned.

And it hurt, that my friends never trusted me!

And oh, the shame!

Frohike: He was a shame!

Langly: Thought of changing my name!

Frohike: Oh, what's in a name!

Langly: And I felt so Shmucked, everytime I was-

Byers: Langly, not in front of Mulder.

Langly: Oh, sorry.

All three: Government Cover-up.

What a frightening phrase.

Government Cover-up,

Ain't no passing craze.

Mulder: (Joins in, and they all lock arm in arm and dance.)

It means all worries, for the rest of my days!

Frohike: Yeah, sing it kid!

All four: It's our problem see, philosophy!

Government Cover-up!

Government Cover-up...

Government... Cover-up!

(music ends, the computer starts to beep. They all go over.)

Frohike: Right, this man's a mister Frank Retrik.

Byers: According to this, he disappeared decades ago.

Langly: And now he ends up here.

Frohike: Are you guys thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?

Byers: I think so Frohike, but why would he come all this way to kill himself to an awaiting public?

Frohike: What?

Langly: No, Byers... not that! Frohike thinks this man is a part of those Syndi-Bastards Mulder is always chasing around.

Mulder: You think so?

Frohike: I know-so. The date he disappeared is around the time our hypothesized Syndicate showed up.

Mulder: But, does this mean they're still together?

Byers: Either that, or they're trying to regroup.

Mulder: And this guy, a former member, declined to the regrouping, and was killed.

Frohike: Exactly!

Mulder: Right. Thanks guys.

Langly: You know, Mulder, we're going to have to start charging you for this stuff.

Mulder: Sure, handsome. (turns and leaves.)

Byers: Now, back to business. What is this thing? (looks at the strange glowing device again.)

(X)

Setting: Skinner's office. Skinner looks pissed as he looks through papers on his desk. He glares up as the two agents walk in.

Skinner: What do you have, agents?

Mulder: (takes a seat, same with Scully.) Not much, I'm afraid.

Skinner: Not much? This is your asses, agents, I expect explanations.

Scully: Well, we found out that the man did not kill himself. His wrists were cut open before he got to his apartment.

Skinner: Anything on the identification?

Mulder: His name is Frank Retrik. He disappeared a long time ago, and has suddenly turned up here. For what reasons, we are unsure of.

Skinner: That's it?

Mulder: Yes, sir.

Scully: You have to understand, sir, that we just came onto this case, and have had little time to investigate-

Skinner: Don't get me started, agents. You've been nothing but trouble ever since I met you. I've been your assistant director twice, and I've seen you do better. How can I make good agents out of you two?

(music from Mulan for the song "I'll make a man out of you" starts, and Skinner slowly folds his arms and shakes his head.)

Skinner: Let's get down to business,

To discuss your jobs.

Don't you give me this crap,

You're a bunch of slobs!

You're the saddest pair, I have ever met,

But you can bet, before were through,

Somehow I'll make agents out of you.

You must solve a murder,

Or you're fired tonight.

Once you find your suspect,

Don't cower in fright.

You're a spineless pale, pathetic pair,

And you haven't found a clue!

Somehow I'll make agents out of you.

(music silently in the back ground.) Out agents!

Mulder: (mumbles) We're never going to please this guy.

Scully: (mumbles) Say good-bye to our partnership.

Mulder: (curses) Boy was I a fool to try and talk to him.

Scully: (whispers) Skinner's got him scared to death,

Hope he doesn't see right through me.

Mulder: Now I really wish that I weren't on a limb!

Other Agents in the building as they walk by: Be Agents!

Mulder and Scully: We must be swift as if dodging bullets.

Other Agents: Be Agents!

Mulder and Scully: With all the force of a new Glock Gun.

Other Agents: Be Agents!

Mulder and Scully: With all the strength of a raging cop dog.

Mysterious as our friends the Lone Gunmen!

(Mulder gets a ring on his cell phone. It's Skinner.)

Skinner: Time is racing for you!

Don't you dare get tired!

Heed my every order, you might not get fired.

You're unsuited for the rage of work,

So pack up, go home, you're through.

How could I make agents out of you? (hangs up.)

Other Agents in the building as they walk by: Be Agents!

Mulder and Scully: We must be swift as if dodging bullets.

Other Agents: Be Agents!

Mulder and Scully: With all the force of a new Glock Gun.

Other Agents: Be Agents!

Mulder and Scully: With all the strength of a raging cop dog!

Mysterious as our friends the Lone Gunmen!

Other Agents in the building as they walk by: Be Agents!

Mulder and Scully: We must be swift as if dodging bullets.

Other Agents: Be Agents!

Mulder and Scully: With all the force of a new Glock Gun.

Other Agents: Be Agents!

Mulder and Scully: With all the strength of a raging cop dog!

Mysterious as our friends the Lone Gunmen!

(music ends, and they head out the front door of the FBI headquarters.)

Mulder: It looks like we're relieved of duty.

Scully: Yeah. Skinner was really angry today. I don't know what has gotten into him.

Mulder: You're right.

(X)

Setting: A small room, dark and silent. Cigarette Smoking Man looks out his blinds and sees Mulder and Scully walking down below. He had heard the rumors of the Syndicate, and their rise once again. He thought they were dead, but he was wrong, some had survived. Now he questions his identity itself. He lights a Morley and smokes it silently.

Cigarette Smoking Man: So, they're coming together again. Strange. Very strange. Poor Retrik... never turn down the Syndicate, never. That was my mistake. But they haven't killed me yet. Yet...

(he picks up a picture of Mulder and Samantha younger, side by side. Then he picks up another one of him and Mulder's father.)

(music from Mulan and the song "Reflection". He puts out his Morley and sits and looks at his pictures and memories.)

CSM: Look at me, I will never pass for a true bad guy,

Or a perfect villain.

Can it be, I'm not meant to play this part?

Now I see, that if I were truly to be myself,

I would never live too long.

(gets up and spins to a mirror, but turns away, disgraced.)

Who is that man I see, staring straight back at me?

Why is my reflection someone I don't know?

Somehow I cannot hide, who I am,

Though I've tried.

When will my reflection show,

Who I am inside?

(goes to window again, and looks down at the busy cars below. His reflection is in the window, faint and light.)

When will my reflection show,

Who I am inside?

(music ends, and CSM sighs, and turns away from window.)

(X)

Setting: Later that night, in Mulder's apartment. Mulder comes in his door, turns and locks it again. He turns on the light to see Mr. X sitting on his couch.

Mulder: You're alive.

Mr. X: Of course, Mulder. And I have a job for you.

Mulder: Krycek told me you were alive, and would come.

Mr. X: He contacted you?

Mulder: He warned me you would come, and give me news of something I wasn't prepared for.

Mr. X: Indeed, you might not be.

Mulder: I'm ready for anything.

Mr. X: The Syndicate has risen again.

Mulder: I thought they were dead.

Mr. X: So did everyone else who knew about them. I also came to tell you that the man killed this morning was a part of it, but declined, so he was killed so he wouldn't leak to the public. But it seems you find out by yourself.

Mulder: Then why are you here?

Mr. X: I have a job for you.

Mulder: Whatever it is, I don't want it.

Mr. X: I think you do, Mr. Mulder.

(music starts up from the Lion King, from the song "Be Prepared".)

Mr. X: (thinks in this head:) I never thought Mulder essential.

He's crude, and unspeakable pain.

Could it be he has a little bit potential, (looks over at Mulder)

Mulder: (smiles dumbfoundedly.)

Mr. X: If allied with my vision and brain.

(aloud:) I know your powers of deduction,

Are as dry as Skinner's blank stare.

But thick as you are, pay attention!

My words are a matter of truth.

It's clear by your vacant expression,

The lights are not all on upstairs.

But we're talking lies and corruption,

Even you can't find out what they mean!

Prepare for the chance of a lifetime,

Be prepared for some horrible news,

A shining new era is tiptoeing nearer.

Mulder: And where do I feature?

Mr. X: Just listen to teacher.

I know it sounds sorted, but you'll be rewarded,

When at last they give you the truth,

And injustice, deliciously squared, be prepared!

Mulder: Prepared, I'll be prepared... for what?

Mr. X: For the fall of the Syndicate!

Mulder: Why are they sick?

Mr. X: No fool! The aliens will kill them, and Krycek too.

Mulder: Great idea! Who needs more lies?

No lies, no lies, la-la-la la-la la!

Mr. X: Idiot! There will be more lies!

Mulder: Hey, but you said, uh...

Mr. X: More lies will come, but if you stick with me,

You'll never hear a lie again!

Mulder: Yeah, alright! Long live the truth, long live the truth!

It's great that I'll soon be protected,

With a boss who will be all time truthful.

Mr. X: But of course, with proquerl, you're expected,

To take certain duties on board.

The future is littered with fighting,

And though I may receive,

The point that I must emphasize is,

You won't get the truth without me!

So prepare for the coo of the century,

So prepare for the murcious scam.

Meticulous planning, tenacity spanning, decades of denial.

Is simply why I'll,

Be trusted, disputed, respected, soluted,

And seen for the truth I have found!

Yes my plan and ambitions are bared, be prepared!

Yes my plan and ambitions are bared, be prepared!

(music ends)

Mulder: So, what do you want me to do?

(X)

Setting: The Lone Gunmen Headquarters, again. They are just getting up, when they hear a knock at their door. They go to it and see Agent Scully standing there. Frohike lets her in.

Frohike: Nice of you to drop by, lovely agent Scully.

Scully: (annoyed:) Thanks. Is Mulder here?

Byers: Sorry, he isn't.

Langly: He was here yesturday, but hasn't been here since.

Byers: Why, is he missing?

Scully: You could say that. I went by his apartment, but he wasn't there. I've tried contacting him on the cell phone but to no avail. So, in conclusion, I thought I would try the last resort. You guys.

Frohike: (sarcastically:) Makes me feel all tingly inside.

Scully: And he's not here.

Byers: You think it has something to do with that man we found yesturday. His identity and all.

Scully: He did tell me that Krycek contacted him.

Byers: Who?

Frohike: The Rat Bastard.

Byers: Right, and what else, agent Scully?

Scully: He said that Krycek warned him that Mr. X would contact him.

Frohike: No kidding. You think Mulder and Mr. X are together now?

Byers: Inevitably.

Scully: Okay. Thanks for the input. (walks to door, but is stopped by Frohike blocking her path.) Move it, Frohike.

Frohike: You're so lovely, agent Scully.

(music from the Lion King starts up, from the song "Can you feel the love tonight?" Frohike grips his heart, and stares at Scully, as she rolls her eyes.)

Byers: I can see what's happening.

Langly: What?

Byers: And she don't have a clue.

Langly: Who?

Byers: She'll break his heart, and here's the bottom line,

Our Trio's in deep trouble.

The sweet cheap smell of colone, there it is in the air,

With all this romantic atmosphere, disaster's in the air!

(Background chorus begins, as –in slow mo- Frohike starts to chase Scully around the room.)

Chorus singers: Can you feel the love tonight?

The hell Frohike brings?

The world for once in perfect chaos,

With all this chasing here.

Frohike: (stops, a little ways away from Scully.)

So many things to tell you,

But what I can't decide,

The truth about my past? Impossible

You'd turn away from me!

Scully: (in her mind:) He's holding back, thank God!

But what, I could care less,

Why can't he be normal, no it can't be,

Normal he is inside!

Chorus singers: Can you feel the love tonight?

The hell Frohike brings?

The world for once in perfect chaos,

With all this chasing here.

Byers: Can you feel the love tonight?

Langly: No.

Byers: You needn't look to far!

Look right there, our poor friend, Frohike,

He loves her, she hates him.

Langly: But if he falls for her again,

It can be assumed...

Byers: His hacking days with us is history,

Both: In short our pal is doomed!

(music ends)

Frohike: (straightens and heads towards the door, opens it for her and smiles, normal.) It was nice of you to drop by, Agent Scully.

Scully: Uhh huh. (quickly leaves.)

Byers and Langly: Melvin!

Frohike: What?

(X)

Setting: In front of the Syndicate building in the afternoon. Mulder looks up and knows what he has to do. He has them now. Mr. X had set the bomb under their building, and they were in there now. All Mulder has to do is push the button, and they were gone. He sits in his car watching the building across the street, getting ready to push the button. Just then, Krycek reaches in and pulls Mulder out of the car.

Krycek: What are you doing?

Mulder: What does it look like? I'm going to get rid of them once and for all!

Krycek: (harshly:) Do that, and you'll never know the truth! You'll kill them! Mass murder! They'll all be gone and you will never see your sister or partner again! Don't you see? It's what he wants!

Mulder: Mr. X will bring order and tell no lies, the truth will be found.

Krycek: No it won't. It will only be buried in the rubble. Mr. X is using you, Mulder! He's using you for his own personal vendetta, his own revenge!

Mulder: He only wants the truth, and for the Syndicate to fall.

Krycek: For it to fall, and you with it! He's used you from the start. He's manipulated you into doing his dirty work! You do this, and you'll be blamed, not him. You.

Mulder: You're working for them! I can't trust you!

Krycek: You can't trust Mr. X either! For the last time, Mulder think about what you're doing. You're killing them, and your last chance at the truth will be gone. They know the truth to the lies. Mr. X knows nothing, nothing but revenge and hate. You've got to look past that! I want the truth as much as you do. So Mulder, for once in your life, trust me. Please.

Mulder: (thinks about this, and then looks down at the detonator. He glances up into Krycek's eyes and nods. He slowly turns it off and drop it on the ground.) Krycek, I'll listen to you once, and for the last time. I can never trust you, never be your friend. But for once, I will listen. Now go, Mr. X and the Syndicate will be looking for you.

Krycek: Mulder, thank you for not making a mistake. Goodbye. (turns and leaves off and turns at a corner. Already he knows someone is following him. Little did the Syndicate know that Krycek just saved their lives.)

(music from Pocahontas and the song "Just around the Riverbend" start, as Krycek starts to run, and get away as fast as he can.)

Krycek: What I love best about running is,

You can't stop yourself once you're gone.

The setting's always changing, never stopping.

Most people I guess can't live like that,

We all must pay a price.

To be safe I lose my chance at ever knowing.

(spins around a corner)

What's around my corner now,

Waiting just around my corner now?

I look once more,

To see a car blow up, beyond control,

Where the debris fly free, don't know what for.

What I dream the day might send,

Just around my corner now, for me, coming for me?

(hops inside a building, his apartment.)

I feel that there beyond my sight,

Or right behind in my shadow,

Can I ignor that sound, that distant warning?

For a handsome sturdy price-range,

That will bring me a good life,

And never have to think that someone's coming.

Just around my corner now, just around my corner now.

I look once more, just around my corner now,

Beyond my sight, don't know what for,

Why are all my dreams cut short,

Just around my corner now, just around my corner now?

(Inside his apartment, sits down in his chair.)

(Quietly:) Should I give up to them now?

Ready for a quick death now,

Should I give up to them now,

Is all my running at an end?

Or do I have a chance for living today?

Just around my corner now.

(music ends)

(X)

Setting: Scully's apartment. She's sitting there, looking at Mulder, who is sitting across from her, looking depressed.

Scully: It wasn't your fault you were manipulated so quickly.

Mulder: Yes it is! I'm such a idiot.

Scully: (Softly) You can say that again.

Mulder: (Mulder is so depressed he doesn't notice.) Why me! Why did I have to be so gulible?

Scully: Don't blame yourself Mulder. How could you know what Mr. X was really thinking?

Mulder: I should have! I should have!

(as Mulder goes ranting on about how he was so stupid, Scully starts to drift off, and think of poor Mulder.)

(music from Beauty and the Beast starts, from the song "Something There".)

Scully: (in her mind:) There's something sweet, and almost kind,

But he was mean, and he was course, and unrefined,

But now he's dear, and so I'm sure,

(she places a hand on his shoulder, he looks up, she smiles, and he goes silent.)

I wonder why I didn't see it there before.

Mulder: (in his mind:) She glanced at me, I thought I saw,

And when we met, she didn't shudder at my place,

No, it can't be, I'll just ignore. (looks away, but then looks back up.)

Then again, she's never looked at me that way before.

(Scully gets up and walks away.)

Scully: (in her mind:) New, and a bit alarming,

Who'd have ever thought that this could be?

True, that we are just partners,

But there's something in him that I simply didn't see...

(Her cell phone rings.)

Scully: (aloud:) Scully?

Skinner: Look, I've thought about you two for the last day. You can start working again. You start tomorrow.

Scully: Thankyou, sir.

Skinner: I don't want any more trouble from you two. (Scully nods, and hears as Mulder leaves her apartment. She turns to see her front door closing.)

Scully: You won't, sir. (She hangs up, and again stares at her closed door.) Mulder.

(X)

Setting: The church where Dana Scully always goes when she's feeling down. She makes a cross as she enters and sits down on one of the wooden benches.

(music from The Hunchback of Notre Dam from the song "God help the Outcasts" starts and she lays her hands in her lap, she looks up at the front of the church.)

Scully: I don't know if you can hear me,

(she looks down, then back up.)

or if you're even there,

I don't know if you would listen, to an agent's prayer.

Yes, I know he's just an outcast,

He wouldn't speak to you.

(she stares at the cross ahead of her.)

Still I see your face and wonder,

Were you once an outcast too?

God help my partner,

Lonely from birth,

Show him some mercy

He can't find right now.

God help my partner,

I look to you still.

God help my partner, or nobody will.

(Get's up and stands.)

I ask for help,

I ask right now,

I ask for glory to shine on his name,

I ask for love... can I posses?

I ask for God to somehow bless my partner.

I ask for nothing, I can get by,

But I know that he is, less lucky than I,

Please help my partner, he sad and downtrod,

I thought we all had a chance in this world,

God help my partner, or nobody will.

(music stops.)

(She stands, silently, when she hears someone else walk in behind her.)

Mulder: I thought I'd find you here.

Scully: Mulder. (She turns around and faces him.) It wasn't your fault.

Mulder: I know, Scully. I should have realized it. You were there for me, Scully, and I want to thank you for that.

Scully: Your welcome. You're just too paranoid for your own good. (she smiled, and he did also. Then they reached out and hugged eachother.)

(X)

Setting: The Syndicate meeting room.

Main Syndicate Man: It looks like Mr. X's plan went awry. We have beaten them once again. Any news on Krycek?

Syndicate Man 1: No, we lost him after a couple of blocks.

SM 2: We'll get him soon.

MSM: And what of Spender senior?

SM 1: CSM? I don't know. We haven't been able to find him ever since we were broken up.

MSM: The only good thing is, we're together once again. A group of fearless leaders, strong and stout. And those who don't agree, well, you're out.

(X)

Setting: Mulder's office. He sits there, pondering about the whole situation. He had gone through a whole adventure in less than 48 hours. Now he sat alone, thinking of Scully and then he glances at a picture of Samantha, his lost sister, who was abducted by aliens so long ago.

(Music from The Little Mermaid begins, the song is "A Part of Your World".)

Mulder: Maybe they're right.

Maybe there is something the matter with me.

I just don't see how a world that has so many cover-ups, could be good.

(Gets up and strolls out from behind his desk.)

Look at this stuff, isn't it neat?

Wouldn't you think my file cabinet's complete?

Wouldn't you think I'm the guy, the guy who has lost his mind?

Look at this file, cases unsolved,

How many wonders can one office hold?

Looking around here you think, sure, this guy lost his mind.

(flips through files)

I've got spaceships and bodies of plenty,

I've got tapeworms and strange things galore.

(picks up a box full posters)

You want posters? I got twenty.

(Drops the box)

But who cares, no big deal, I want more!

I wanna be where my sister is,

I wanna see, wanna see some spaceships,

Walking around in those... what do you call 'em? Oh, UFO's.

Flashing your badge you don't get too far,

Guns are required for shooting, killing,

Strolling along down a, what's that word again? Train!

Down where they (aliens) hide,

Down where they run,

Down where they stay away from the sun,

Lying there dead, wish I could take one of those heads!

What would I do if I had to, live without my partner?

What would happen to me, if she weren't by my side?

Betchya in space, they understand that they don't,

Keep things from the public.

Bright young agents, sick of guessing, ready to know!

Oh, I wanna know what CSM knows,

Ask him my questions and get some answers.

'What's this file, and why do you...' what's the phrase? 'have it?'

Whens it my turn, wouldn't I love,

Love to see my sister once again?

(sits back down)

Out of my mind,

Wish I could find,

My sister now.

(music ends)

(X)

Setting: The streets outside of the FBI Headquarters. Mulder is coming out, and is greeted by his partner, Agent Scully. She smiles and he does too. It's a beautiful, sunny day, white fluffy clouds littering the sky.

Mulder: It's all over, another X-File.

Scully: It most certainly is. And it has taught us a good lesson.

Mulder: What?

Scully: Trust no one, like you said to me so many years ago.

Mulder: (pauses) You're right. Trust no one. (there's a tap on his shoulder, and he turns around and sees everyone. Literally everyone. The Lone Gunmen, Krycek, Skinner, The whole Syndicate, Mr. X, and CSM)

(Music from Beauty and the Beast, and the song "Be Our Guest" starts, and Mulder jumps in front of all of them)

Mulder: Trust no one. Trust no one. Put my service to the test!

Main Syndicate Man: Get your tie on 'round your neck, Mulder, and we'll say all the rest.

All of Syndicate: (arm in arm, doing the can-can) We are the, Syndicate!

Syndicate Man 1: Why we only live to lie!

SM 2: (lifts up vial of black liquid) Here's the black oil, we have a cure! Don't believe me, ask your partner!

Scully: They can sing?

Mulder: They can dance?

Syndicate: After all this is our chance! Our conspiracies are never second best! Go on unfold your file, take a glance and then you'll trust no one, trust no one, trust no one!

Mulder: (jumps out in front of everyone) Here I am, Fox Mulder! With my partner by my side! I won't prepare, leave with speed. Don't worry I've done this before.

Scully: (touches his arm) You're obsessed, and you're mad, but the badguy's have all won!

Mulder: (squints at partner, glowering) No one's glooming or complaining while I'm off saving _someone's_ butt.

Lone Gunmen: We tell jokes!

Langly: I do tricks, with my two computer buds.

Lone Gunmen: It's all in our newsletter, that you can read!

Mr. X: (suddenly) Go on and lift a hatch, you've found your own spaceman, to study on!

MSM: If you're stressed, it's fine lying we suggest!

Everyone: Like we said, trust no one, trust no one!

Mulder: Life is so unnerving, with a world with so much lying! We're not whole without some truth to look upon.

Scully: Ah, those good old days, when I was useful! Suddenly my doctor days are gone. Six years we've been searching, needing so much more than nothing. Needing something new, a chance to use my skills! Most days we just chase around a killer.

Mulder: (stepping into the spotlight, and the middle of the street) Running, quick and ready, I walk in and then _you're_ ready!

Everyone: It's a lie, trust no one!

Cigarrete Smoking Man: My God this will never be done! The black plagues out, thank the lord, I have the antidote in hand.

Skinner: (at his desk in the middle of the street) With all this, they'll want me, and my God then they will see. While the partners do the tango, I'll be sitting, I'll be frowning.

Mulder and Scully: (jump onto Skinner's desk, in eachother's arms, and start the tango –brief tango music flips on- then they jump off)

Sklinner: I'll get stressed, piping mad! (a gunshot goes off, Skinner leaps to his feet) For God's sakes, was that a shot?

MSM: Clean it up, we want the audience impressed! We've got a job to do. (Syndicate, behind Skinner, drag off anonymous body)

Skinner: Was it one shot or two? Now who did this?

Everyone: Trust no one!

Skinner: Who did this?

Everyone: (step in front of Skinner) Trust no one! Trust no one! Trust no one!

Krycek: My command is your request. I've been jumping sides with everyone here-

Everyone else: And we're obsessed!

Mulder: With my badge, with my gun, yes indeed I shoot to kill! (looks up as a spaceship suddenly appears, and a giant glowing light glows down)

Everyone: While the spaceship light's still glowing, let us help you, we'll keep going! File by File! One by one!(everyone arm in arm) 'Till you shout: "My God it's mine!"

Syndicate: Then we'll send two big henchmen to your address!

Everyone: Tonight you'll keep yourself up, but for now let's end this! Trust no one! Trust no one! Trust no one! Please... Trust... No... One!!! (grand finale and everyone is reaching into the sky slowly, and the music ends)

(X)

Setting: Lone Gunmen Headquarters once again. They still sit there looking at the strange device. It glows and hums constantly.

Frohike: What are we going to do about it?

Byers: Maybe we should find the off button.

Langly: Sounds good to me.

Byers: Is this is? (He points to a glowing red button.)

Frohike: Only one way to find out.

Byers: (presses the button)

(X)

Setting: The Lone Gunmen Headquarters, though this time, we are now out of the other dimension. Everyone in the X-Files universe is now back to normal. The three lean back away from the strange machine. They have no recollection of the previous two days. It's late, and they shake their heads.

Byers: Well, I don't know about you two, but I'm strangely tired.

Langly: Me too.

Frohike: Me three. (He turns to go to bed, when he knocks down something from the table where the strange device is. He picks it up. It's a tape recorder. He presses the stop button, then rewinds it.) Hey, you guys, did any of you turn this on?

Byers: What is it?

Frohike: A tape recorder, it was taping something.

Langly: Let's hear it.

Frohike: Okay. (He pressed stop randomly and presses play. Suddenly they hear people singing to a familiar song. But the words are strangely different. The people are singing something along the lines of: "Government Cover-up, what a wonderful phrase...")

Byers: Is that us?

Langly: I hope not.

Frohike: No, there! That sounds like you Langly.

Langly: And that sounds like you.

Frohike: No it doesn't... wait, that's Mulder!

Byers: Uh, I don't want to know where this came from.

Langly: This is someone's idea of a joke.

Frohike: No! I think it's another cover-up, like the song says. Some one's warning us. (He starts to sing:) Government Cover-up, what a wonderful-

Langly: Shut up!

Byers: I think this has something to do with the device. I think we should put it back where we found it.

(X)

Setting: Outside the Lone Gunmen Headquarters. The device sits there, beeping quietly in the hallway. Footsteps come from the distance. Slowly, a dark figure comes up and picks the device up. Strangly, the Lone Gunmen's security camera, at that moment, picks up only black fog.

Me (the writer): I hope everyone enjoyed this. (walks off into the shadows, with the device under-arm.)

(X)

THE END


End file.
